Wednesday, October 13, 2010

Meditation on a fortune cookie

I take fortune cookies too seriously. There used to be a Chinese buffet next to the mall. The food was cheap and awful. About the only thing they didn't fuck up was the soup, but I used to love the fortune cookies.

Whatever company they got their cookies from had a very dark and malevolent bent. Every cookie I ever got came with a warning or a pronouncement that was vaguely threatening. One of my favorites was something like, "Life is difficult. You will have to become accustom to this."

I was very sorry when the place closed.

The other day I went out to lunch, had Chinese food and got a cookie. My fortune was "Don't pass up a once-in-a-lifetime offer." So, for the past couple of days I've been waiting for that once-in-a-lifetime offer. I'm been waiting because right now I think I need something out of the ordinary that's going to change everything, that's going to be amazing, that's going to give me a much needed dose of sunshine.

I don't think it's coming. I think those once-in-a-lifetime offers happen every day. It's the phone call you're supposed to return, the lunch date you have to break, the ticket you turn down. It's the things you don't realize are only going to come around just this once.

I'm not waiting for an offer. The offers have been coming all along. I guess today I'm thinking about what happened all the times I turned them down because I was too busy, too tired or maybe too nervous.

It's a lot.

So, my fortune, I think, isn't a peek into the future. It's another warning for today.

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