It's important to stay in the moment. Looking too far ahead, hoping and planning, is mostly self-destructive. You build up what you hope will happen and when it doesn't, you're crushed. This is my experience.
Still, without much effort, next summer is trying to shape up into something. The All Good Festival was sort of a failure for me this year. Next year, it might not be. I'm certainly considering how to approach it again.
I'm also getting into shape. I've dropped a few pounds --not a lot of weight, but enough to feel much, much better. Project Captain America By Christmas is starting to show results (though really, I have no plans to get a pair of tights or a shield to carry around --just get as healthy as I can). So, it might be possible for me to do something physically competitive next year. I'm still researching events, looking for something that seems kind of fun and offbeat.
Meanwhile, I think I've come up with a particularly diabolical way to make money (legally) and potentially get paid for writing about it. It's absolutely appalling in a ghoulish sort of way.
The money could be the means to afford an actual vacation, a little excursion somewhere --next year. There will be no vacations this year, campers. The piggy bank was turned into sausage back into June.
Anyway, I'm staying in the moment, but considering that my next summer might have some promise.
Wednesday, July 15, 2009
Tuesday, July 14, 2009
42, 41
Two this week.
Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee: Dee Brown -I got the suggestion to read this one from musician Steve Earle, who was told to read it by Townes Van Zant.
I'm not a hundred percent sure how I feel about the book. On the one hand, I do believe much of what Brown writes and "chronicles" about the plains Indians, their contact and subsequent mistreatment by the American government and white people in general. Based on other readings, initial contacts with the Cheyenne, the Apache and the Arapaho were probably reasonably peaceful. For instance, the tribes tended to be very nice to the Spanish explorers who visited (largely, I think, because they were frightened of them, their horses and their guns. They weren't so nice to the Spaniards who wound up away from the pack), but I have a hard time swallowing the always innocent Indian routine.
However, they got screwed and the book at least points out it wasn't their fault.
One of the positive sides, is it gives an insight to how the government and business is still playing the same zero sum game of fucking over the weak or disorganized in favor of the wealthy and motivated. It might be the Indians of today are the hillbillies of rural America who get shafted with Mountain Top removal, toxic dump sites and medical waste disposal areas.
Shutter Island: Dennis Lehane -I don't read as much fiction as I used to. Partly, this has to do with discovery process of finding new authors to read. As much as I read, I toss quite a few back as annoying or uninteresting.
I picked this one up because I saw the trailer for the upcoming film and because I read Mystic River. The trailer was spooky and the book is every bit as creepy, dark and even heart breaking.
In 1954, U.S. Marshall Teddy Daniels goes to Shutter Island, a facility for the criminally insane, to search for a patient who has mysteriously vanished. Shutter Island houses the worst of the worst: violent and delusional people who've murdered, maimed and raped. Daniels comes to the island with an agenda, to find the man he believes is responsible for the death of his wife and to get the goods on the facility which may or may not be practicing illegal medical experiments on some of the patients.
It's a full-blown page turner, though not "high art" by any means. The writing is so-so. The dialogue tends toward the average noir, but it's got a hell of a plot. I burned through it in two sittings. While I sort of figured out the disposition of the ending about halfway through, the book managed to keep up enough ambiguity to make me wonder if I really had it all the way to the end. And truly, the ending was agony.
I can't give any comparisons for fear of spoiling what could be a pretty decent film. The movie will be out soon. Martin Scorcese directs and Leo DiCaprio stars. And naturally, it's a great summer read.
Bury My Heart At Wounded Knee: Dee Brown -I got the suggestion to read this one from musician Steve Earle, who was told to read it by Townes Van Zant.
I'm not a hundred percent sure how I feel about the book. On the one hand, I do believe much of what Brown writes and "chronicles" about the plains Indians, their contact and subsequent mistreatment by the American government and white people in general. Based on other readings, initial contacts with the Cheyenne, the Apache and the Arapaho were probably reasonably peaceful. For instance, the tribes tended to be very nice to the Spanish explorers who visited (largely, I think, because they were frightened of them, their horses and their guns. They weren't so nice to the Spaniards who wound up away from the pack), but I have a hard time swallowing the always innocent Indian routine.
However, they got screwed and the book at least points out it wasn't their fault.
One of the positive sides, is it gives an insight to how the government and business is still playing the same zero sum game of fucking over the weak or disorganized in favor of the wealthy and motivated. It might be the Indians of today are the hillbillies of rural America who get shafted with Mountain Top removal, toxic dump sites and medical waste disposal areas.
Shutter Island: Dennis Lehane -I don't read as much fiction as I used to. Partly, this has to do with discovery process of finding new authors to read. As much as I read, I toss quite a few back as annoying or uninteresting.
I picked this one up because I saw the trailer for the upcoming film and because I read Mystic River. The trailer was spooky and the book is every bit as creepy, dark and even heart breaking.
In 1954, U.S. Marshall Teddy Daniels goes to Shutter Island, a facility for the criminally insane, to search for a patient who has mysteriously vanished. Shutter Island houses the worst of the worst: violent and delusional people who've murdered, maimed and raped. Daniels comes to the island with an agenda, to find the man he believes is responsible for the death of his wife and to get the goods on the facility which may or may not be practicing illegal medical experiments on some of the patients.
It's a full-blown page turner, though not "high art" by any means. The writing is so-so. The dialogue tends toward the average noir, but it's got a hell of a plot. I burned through it in two sittings. While I sort of figured out the disposition of the ending about halfway through, the book managed to keep up enough ambiguity to make me wonder if I really had it all the way to the end. And truly, the ending was agony.
I can't give any comparisons for fear of spoiling what could be a pretty decent film. The movie will be out soon. Martin Scorcese directs and Leo DiCaprio stars. And naturally, it's a great summer read.
Monday, July 6, 2009
45,44, 43
Three this week.
Dismantling The Hills: Michael McGriff -Really interesting post-industrial poetry. It captures a lot of the restlessness and feelings of loss as the steady working class society before the Reagan era dissolved. McGriff's economy and ability to turn a phrase is remarkable. I need to find more of his work.
I enjoy poetry, though I don't write much myself. I lack a soul and have a low tolerance for my own pretentiousness. Still, I enjoy picking them apart. Part of the joy of a poem, for me, is the awe in appreciating the energy and force of will that often goes into creating them. The struggle to fit a lot of passion, a lot of poison, into neat, little lines is inspiring and reminds me to pay attention to my own writing.
The U.S. Navy Seal Workout: Andrew Flach -A no-nonsense approach to fitness and health that basically says if you want to get in shape, there isn't a shortcut. Some good ideas and tips for the average joe, including stretches and how much time to dedicate to the process. It's very basic, short on the usual hand-holding and self-esteem building and big on vision. If you can devote an hour to two hours a day and you're not afraid to sweat, the book promises you can turn yourself into something extraordinary.
As Project Captain America is underway, I'm buying into this hook, line and sinker. I'll be doubling my workout times from 25-30 minutes to right at an hour with the hopes of getting them up to two hours eventually. Will this actually happen? Who knows? I'm going to do it anyway. The recent photos of me as in Lederhosen, while a hoot, also reminded me the reaper (don't fear the reaper, right?) is working the drive-thru.
Anyway, we're trying and the book has me thinking about fitness in a positive way.
Salmonella Men On Planet Porno: Yasutaka Tsutsui -More proof that reading foreigners during this hundred book challenge is asking for punishment. Slow moving, strange, but occasionally spell-binding, Tsutsui writes some curious tales, largely about conformity. The translation feels like it's a bit off, but it still works well enough to get the point across.
I like Asian books. At least, to me, it seems riskier than mainstream. I also like the slightly askew cultural imprint. The rules of storytelling are a little different, which can take the story in unusual places. Haruki Murakami is a favorite and I'm willing to read more by Tsutsu --just not right now. It's rewarding, but slow-going.
Dismantling The Hills: Michael McGriff -Really interesting post-industrial poetry. It captures a lot of the restlessness and feelings of loss as the steady working class society before the Reagan era dissolved. McGriff's economy and ability to turn a phrase is remarkable. I need to find more of his work.
I enjoy poetry, though I don't write much myself. I lack a soul and have a low tolerance for my own pretentiousness. Still, I enjoy picking them apart. Part of the joy of a poem, for me, is the awe in appreciating the energy and force of will that often goes into creating them. The struggle to fit a lot of passion, a lot of poison, into neat, little lines is inspiring and reminds me to pay attention to my own writing.
The U.S. Navy Seal Workout: Andrew Flach -A no-nonsense approach to fitness and health that basically says if you want to get in shape, there isn't a shortcut. Some good ideas and tips for the average joe, including stretches and how much time to dedicate to the process. It's very basic, short on the usual hand-holding and self-esteem building and big on vision. If you can devote an hour to two hours a day and you're not afraid to sweat, the book promises you can turn yourself into something extraordinary.
As Project Captain America is underway, I'm buying into this hook, line and sinker. I'll be doubling my workout times from 25-30 minutes to right at an hour with the hopes of getting them up to two hours eventually. Will this actually happen? Who knows? I'm going to do it anyway. The recent photos of me as in Lederhosen, while a hoot, also reminded me the reaper (don't fear the reaper, right?) is working the drive-thru.
Anyway, we're trying and the book has me thinking about fitness in a positive way.
Salmonella Men On Planet Porno: Yasutaka Tsutsui -More proof that reading foreigners during this hundred book challenge is asking for punishment. Slow moving, strange, but occasionally spell-binding, Tsutsui writes some curious tales, largely about conformity. The translation feels like it's a bit off, but it still works well enough to get the point across.
I like Asian books. At least, to me, it seems riskier than mainstream. I also like the slightly askew cultural imprint. The rules of storytelling are a little different, which can take the story in unusual places. Haruki Murakami is a favorite and I'm willing to read more by Tsutsu --just not right now. It's rewarding, but slow-going.
Thursday, July 2, 2009
46
Eek... another slow week. I'm falling behind.
Much of this is my own fault. I've picked up a couple of books that are not quick, easy reads. On my honor, I promise to fill my head with nothing but mush through most of July and all of August. That should catch me up.
50/50: Secrets I learned running 50 marathons in 50 days and how you can achieve super endurance! : Dean Karnazes - Well, what can I say about this one? I didn't much like it. The secrets Dean learned could be gleaned from a random copy of Runner's World found at a dental office. Nothing really of note and not even a lot of drama, just a pretty dry story about a guy who convinced North Face to sponsor a promotional run in 50 states in 50 days and how at the end of it, he ran from New York to Indiana just because.
Improving my fitness has been one of my goals for years and lately, I've been giving it a try. I'm eating better, getting to the gym a couple of times a week and trying to get a few hours of sleep a night. I call this the Captain America by Christmas plan --the idea being I'll be in comic book superhero shape in roughly six months. It's laughable, which makes it fun.
Dean almost seems like a normal guy, but obviously he isn't. Normal people do not run a hundred miles in a day or do ultra marathons on a regular basis for fun. Normal people watch C.S.I.: Fresno, eat cookie dough out of a plastic sack then jerk off to the weather report before nodding off.
The perception is because I thought he was one of the common people, he'd have some answers, some ideas. The only idea he had was the same one I have, which is just to get moving. Kind of a let down. I should have kicked this one to the curb, but I was too far in by the time I realized it was going nowhere.
Much of this is my own fault. I've picked up a couple of books that are not quick, easy reads. On my honor, I promise to fill my head with nothing but mush through most of July and all of August. That should catch me up.
50/50: Secrets I learned running 50 marathons in 50 days and how you can achieve super endurance! : Dean Karnazes - Well, what can I say about this one? I didn't much like it. The secrets Dean learned could be gleaned from a random copy of Runner's World found at a dental office. Nothing really of note and not even a lot of drama, just a pretty dry story about a guy who convinced North Face to sponsor a promotional run in 50 states in 50 days and how at the end of it, he ran from New York to Indiana just because.
Improving my fitness has been one of my goals for years and lately, I've been giving it a try. I'm eating better, getting to the gym a couple of times a week and trying to get a few hours of sleep a night. I call this the Captain America by Christmas plan --the idea being I'll be in comic book superhero shape in roughly six months. It's laughable, which makes it fun.
Dean almost seems like a normal guy, but obviously he isn't. Normal people do not run a hundred miles in a day or do ultra marathons on a regular basis for fun. Normal people watch C.S.I.: Fresno, eat cookie dough out of a plastic sack then jerk off to the weather report before nodding off.
The perception is because I thought he was one of the common people, he'd have some answers, some ideas. The only idea he had was the same one I have, which is just to get moving. Kind of a let down. I should have kicked this one to the curb, but I was too far in by the time I realized it was going nowhere.
Stargate-Charleston
As was pointed out to me, the planned stage and awning thing at Haddad Riverfront Park looks awfully familiar.I, for one, welcome the alien slavers who will bring jobs, opportunities for service and eventually Kurt Russell (or the dude from MacGyver) to my little corner of the universe. Huzzah!
Tuesday, June 23, 2009
49, 48, 47
Three books this week. I'm officially on the slope downward.
Becoming Enlightened: Dalai Lama -I was supposed to keep a moratorium on philosophical/religious texts. They're slow going. You have to think about it. Otherwise, there isn't much point.
This is basically a more detailed overview of the path of being a Buddhist and works out some of the why --though with the lama's usual proviso: It's better to stick with the religion of your own culture if you can.
I got a lot out of it, but mostly it would be prattling to try and explain why it works for me. Suffice to say, the book gave me some comfort and illuminates my purpose. Rock on.
A Voyage Long and Strange: Tony Horwitz -A history and travel writer's retracing of the discovery, conquest and colonization of America by the vikings (roughly 1000 AD), the Spanish (roughly 1500), the French (mid-1500s) and eventually the English (1600s).
It's a fascinating look at the history that has been mostly ignored in average history class rooms. I learned a bunch, including about "The Black Legend" and "The White Legend" of Spanish conquest and the on-again/off-again nature of Columbus's popularity as an icon. I also got a good snootful about the basic universality of European cruelty and barbarism against indigenous peoples, who were largely pretty decent to the assholes who showed up uninvited. They didn't start getting angry until after their village stores and burial sites had been looted a couple of times.
It also managed to give more complex portraits of the men who came to conquer. Sure, they were greedy, homicidal and amazingly short-sighted, but they were also resourceful, brave and resilient. They were also the products of their time. It's difficult to completely condemn the conquistadors as murderers when the world of 1500 was all about domination and subjugation.
The book provided lots of little inside tidbits and showed how the marks left 500 years ago by explorers and lunatics, still remain in parts of the Americas. It was both horrifying and hilarious. Often, the history of European discovery of the West reads like a Monty Python skit gone terribly wrong.
The Monster Loves His Labrynth: Charles Simic -I don't read enough poetry and this really isn't Simic's poetry, but poetic sketches and random musings from his notebooks. Some are funny. Others are profane or touching. As might be expected, it runs a little on the self-absorbed side about the vocation of being a poet, but an interesting look at how Simic sees things.
Becoming Enlightened: Dalai Lama -I was supposed to keep a moratorium on philosophical/religious texts. They're slow going. You have to think about it. Otherwise, there isn't much point.
This is basically a more detailed overview of the path of being a Buddhist and works out some of the why --though with the lama's usual proviso: It's better to stick with the religion of your own culture if you can.
I got a lot out of it, but mostly it would be prattling to try and explain why it works for me. Suffice to say, the book gave me some comfort and illuminates my purpose. Rock on.
A Voyage Long and Strange: Tony Horwitz -A history and travel writer's retracing of the discovery, conquest and colonization of America by the vikings (roughly 1000 AD), the Spanish (roughly 1500), the French (mid-1500s) and eventually the English (1600s).
It's a fascinating look at the history that has been mostly ignored in average history class rooms. I learned a bunch, including about "The Black Legend" and "The White Legend" of Spanish conquest and the on-again/off-again nature of Columbus's popularity as an icon. I also got a good snootful about the basic universality of European cruelty and barbarism against indigenous peoples, who were largely pretty decent to the assholes who showed up uninvited. They didn't start getting angry until after their village stores and burial sites had been looted a couple of times.
It also managed to give more complex portraits of the men who came to conquer. Sure, they were greedy, homicidal and amazingly short-sighted, but they were also resourceful, brave and resilient. They were also the products of their time. It's difficult to completely condemn the conquistadors as murderers when the world of 1500 was all about domination and subjugation.
The book provided lots of little inside tidbits and showed how the marks left 500 years ago by explorers and lunatics, still remain in parts of the Americas. It was both horrifying and hilarious. Often, the history of European discovery of the West reads like a Monty Python skit gone terribly wrong.
The Monster Loves His Labrynth: Charles Simic -I don't read enough poetry and this really isn't Simic's poetry, but poetic sketches and random musings from his notebooks. Some are funny. Others are profane or touching. As might be expected, it runs a little on the self-absorbed side about the vocation of being a poet, but an interesting look at how Simic sees things.
Monday, June 22, 2009
From the crater
As expected, the past week mostly sucked. There's been a lot of turmoil and frustration, which has a funny way of translating itself into dreams and the music in my head. I keep dreaming about the same two people -neither of whom I've seen in ages.
This is all pretty much normal for the time of year, but I'm glad July is just over the horizon. The future always looks more promising than the present, even when it's the apocalypse. In the spirit of hopefulness, I sent off another five queries for my book this afternoon.
This, actually, was funded by my father --who slipped a couple of bucks in with a birthday card this time around. It covered the postage. Gracias, Dad.
The new book, which I am not going to talk about until I have a working story, is going okay. I'm taking it slowly and allowing a lot of free writing, but without much revision just yet. I want to get to the ending before I start slicing and dicing.
As for my other work... right now, the Cartersville stories work best as a collection of short stories and maybe a novella. I've got about ten of them, I think, which can stand alone and could probably use a punch up to get a little creepier. It's a fun place for me to visit, but a full-blown novel feels artificial at this point. I sent the first four off a few weeks back to Weird Tales in hopes at least one of them would attract some attention. So far, nothing...
I also sent a note to RELIX magazine. I'm headed to ALL GOOD in a couple of weeks. I almost wrote a story for them about it last time, but then they green lit the thing after the fact --not really sharp on their part. So, we're trying again.
Call this the silver lining of a life of regular failure: at least, I'm failing at something as opposed to succeeding at nothing.
This is all pretty much normal for the time of year, but I'm glad July is just over the horizon. The future always looks more promising than the present, even when it's the apocalypse. In the spirit of hopefulness, I sent off another five queries for my book this afternoon.
This, actually, was funded by my father --who slipped a couple of bucks in with a birthday card this time around. It covered the postage. Gracias, Dad.
The new book, which I am not going to talk about until I have a working story, is going okay. I'm taking it slowly and allowing a lot of free writing, but without much revision just yet. I want to get to the ending before I start slicing and dicing.
As for my other work... right now, the Cartersville stories work best as a collection of short stories and maybe a novella. I've got about ten of them, I think, which can stand alone and could probably use a punch up to get a little creepier. It's a fun place for me to visit, but a full-blown novel feels artificial at this point. I sent the first four off a few weeks back to Weird Tales in hopes at least one of them would attract some attention. So far, nothing...
I also sent a note to RELIX magazine. I'm headed to ALL GOOD in a couple of weeks. I almost wrote a story for them about it last time, but then they green lit the thing after the fact --not really sharp on their part. So, we're trying again.
Call this the silver lining of a life of regular failure: at least, I'm failing at something as opposed to succeeding at nothing.
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