Coming to Sunday's show k.d. lang concert at the Clay Center, I expected a certain crowd to be in attendance. k.d. lang is not just a fine singer, but has been one of the standard bearers for the gay/lesbian community for nearly two decades.
It made sense the local gay community would come out in force and they did. The aisles were crowded with stereotypical chubby, middle-aged gals with bad haircuts and wearing comfortable shoes. Everybody seemed pretty laid back until the show started, then it took off into weirdsville.
They were a ruder crowd than I expected at a nice theater. Evidently, it's ok for lesbians to shout down singers and beg for memorabilia during a show. It was ok to cough and clear throats during the opening act, a male solo pianist. Magically, thanks to the power of lang's wonderful vocals, all that phlegm dried up after her first song.
Pulling the same sort of shit during a metal show would have been an invitation to a beat down. It's not the kind of thing I expect to see anywhere, let alone a dressy, "upscale" show at the Clay Center. It was a little embarrassing, but after what I saw at Mountain Stage during Regina Spektor's appearance last fall (a large number of mostly women left right after her set, with one more act to go), it makes me wonder if there's some sort of connection? Are audiences in general becoming bigger assholes or are lesbians just jerks at shows?
I'm not sure what to make of it.
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40 comments:
Wow... I feel bad for you and your ignorance. Perhaps, before you go mouthing off about the lesbian and gay community, you should take a look at your own short comings. I feel quite certain that you are far from perfect. What were you doing at a k.d. lang concert if you have such a problem with "the type" of audience she draws? A piece of advice for you my friend. STAY THE FUCK HOME NEXT TIME!
If you'd followed the link or followed the blog for longer than five seconds, you might have noticed I wrote the review of her show in Charleston.
I was there because I'm a fan. Her Hymns of the 49th Parallel album is a classic. I was also assigned to review the show. I'm a music writer. I've actually even interviewed Ms. lang (didn't work out so well, but I did it). I do that kind of thing.
I don't have a problem with the crowd she draws, don't have a problem with lesbians, gay people or people who don't have sex at all. I had a problem with the crowd's lack of manners both to the artists performing (both of whom gave great shows) and to the rest of the audience. The people shouting seemed to fit a very specific type. It was a very specific type who hustled their ass es up to the stage to collect.
Word to the wise, if it's the kind of place where they tell you to turn off your cell phone, it's the kind of place where you should know better than to shout at the performer to give you a guitar pick in the middle of the damned show. This is poor form regardless of who you sleep with.
That's what the post was about, that's what it said, but you, wanting to feel a little persecuted or a little self-righteous, came out swinging.
Get off your pedestal, princess.
Perhaps you should open your eyes a little and see the excitement from k.d. when her fans speak to her.. and if you were there... it was k.d. who started talking to someone in the audience in the first row before anyone shouted anything. k.d. herself got the audience going.. and she does that every performance because she has fun. She is down to earth. It's not dinner at the White House.. it's a concert! Cell phones should be off.. that has nothing to do with the performance. The audience, however does! You are entilted to your opinion as I am mine. I left you a comment.. that's what this section is for.
Jeez. This exchange proves what Lenny Bruce said:
"If you notice, comics will do endless fag jokes, but never dyke jokes, man.
You know why? Because dykes
will punch the shit out of ya!"
Rude is rude.
Um... kd acted somewhat uncomfortable at points about the amount of attention she was getting from the front row. I think she probably could have used a barricade.
She did not crank the audience. This wasn't some county fair, back of a pick up truck rock show, but a theater show. Big difference. The behavior of several, if not many, left a bit to be desired.
You live in West Virginia... That pretty much sums it all up right there. First of all she didn't get attention from the first row. The yelling came from the middle section. Second of all, I was in the first row and I happen to know the young lady that k.d. was talking to in the first row throughout her performance and when the show was entirely over.. she went and grabbed that young girl's hand, shook it and said "thank you". Hmm that's a whole lot of interacting with an audience that she was "uncomfortable" with. She is 46 years old and has been touring and in the music business for a long, long time. I think it would take a lot to make her uncomfortable. You call yourself a writer? You may want to consider taking up a different profession. I'm quite certain k.d. lang, her managers and whoever may be affiliated with her.. does not want some punk pissing off her fan base. Who the hell are you to speak for her anyway? Let me guess... straight.. male.. you think you're "the shit".. right? It's men like you that make us lesbians all the more proud! I have nothing more to say. I have wasted enough time on this.
To primalscreamx:
From the sound of the comments that princess anonymous has left here, I would say guilty as charged.
I would be willing to bet she has never been to your site before or she would know that you don't think you are "the shit".
To princess anonymous:
I must have read a different blog post than you. I don't think he was trying to speak for k.d., her managers, or anyone else that may be affiliated with her. I also failed to read the part where he said k.d was uncomfortable with the entire audience. Just because she enjoyed some banter with your friend does not mean she was ok with people being rude to her opening act or begging for guitar picks during the show. There was also no mention of having a problem with "the type" of crowd she attracts. He only stated that a portion of the crowd was rude.
I was not at this show, but I was at the Mountain Stage show with Regina Spektor, and there was a large crowd of people who got up and left after her portion of the show. There was also a lot of rude comments and behavior during the acts prior to her. I am sure that not all of them were gay or lesbian, but I would bet that most of them were. Regardless of their sexual orientation though, that kind of behavior is just plain shitty. Just like your actions by coming to this site and anonymously cursing someone because they wrote their opinion on their own website is just plain shitty. It is lesbians like you that are giving the the rest of them a bad name.
Peace!
Oh, and by the way, I am a straight male, and I am the shit!
Princess,
I'd say you hit all the high points there. Thanks for coming to Charleston for the show. Sorry I didn't and don't know the code of a lesbian crowd at a concert. That's something to work on for next time. Until I figure that out, you're just going to have to be cooler than me. Thanks for dropping by.
Just because you are a lesbian doesnt mean you can't be a rube, I guess.
On a side note, something else I noticed at the kd lang show. No kids. I looked around and didn't see anyone under the age of around 18 or 19.
I brought my kid -my 19 year-old son. I was glad to have him. I really am kind of a fan of her music and I thought it was a cool chance to share something I liked with him.
But... He might have been one of the very few his age there.
I thought that was sort of funny, too. Tickets were a little up there, but a lot of south hills types take their kids to whatever regardless of the price. It wasn't that much up there and besides, kd lang is the real thing -an award winner with a million dollar voice who still puts out memorable stuff.
Just an odd thing I noticed... but in all fairness, I wasn't hanging around the balcony. For all I know there was a kindergarten class up there, but I sort of doubt it.
I think if you are a "music critic" or whatever you think you are maybe you should stick to just that. YOU were the one that started the negative comments about lesbians - - putting all lesbians into the same group. Shame on you. I guess if the lesbians were not so dykey and a turn off to you and were of the lipstick type then maybe you wouldn't have made the unnecessary comments. You know the standard male fanasty of 2 women together but always femme women, not butch. I think that straight men are so threatened by lesbians, whether they are dykes or femmes, because they know that another woman knows BETTER how to please a woman than they do. GET OVER IT. Go spend some quality time reviewing what you can do with your ORGAN instead of stick someone with it. Next time just review the music and artist. Have a great day.
Princess, glad to see you made it back. It's been a few hours.
While I will admit the contributions lesbians have made to porn are staggering, I'm not sure what that has to do with a few assholes behaving like jerks at a kd lang show.
I appreciate your indignation, though I grow weary of it.
I think I get you dig girls. Cool. We have that in common, but your ability to sexually satisfy another woman wouldn't seem to mean much in the context of this particular discussion.
To be honest, tips on how to satisfy anyone would fall under a completely different topic. I'm not ruling it out as a future post, just that I haven't given it much thought.
well to show your ignorance, the last anonymous was me, not the previous ones labeled anonymous!! So who knows who "princess" is. if you didn't know, to make a comment to your crap, and you don't have a blogger account it comes as anonymous...ok so if you can count...this will be my 2nd post and the last. done with you and i think you must know by now you were offensive even if perhaps you didn't mean to be. get some sensitivity training and move on buddy. and by the way...lesbians have contributed to porn only by way of you idiot men thinking they were lesbians...those are actresses making a man think what they want. you all are so simple. it takes so little to excite you.
As opposed to you... heh... All you need is somebody else's blog and there aren't even pictures.
Such a sad, short-sighted and humorless pair I have seldom seen this side of government work.
For those following along... and you might be. My last commenter decided it would be fun to leave a link to a kd lang page on MSN. I deleted it because in order to read whatever it was linked to, you had to sign in, then get permission from an administrator.
I don't require anyone to tell me who they are or ask permission to say what they want. So far, it hasn't been really abused. I'm not going to suggest anyone give up their anonymity to go see what someone else said.
Just a guess, but I suspect my comments about the crowd has been posted on a kd lang message board. Whatever. Maybe somebody will actually read the text as opposed to reading into it.
This isn't much different than when that country singer running for political office unleashed trolls on me after I mentioned he and the missus were busted up.
The more they do this, the more they sort of suggest an answer to my initial question.
Anyway, the ride may be getting bumpier. I think they want a piece of my hide.
Stay off a guy's blog for a day, and look what one misses.
The irony is, this indignation over a couple of observations couldn't be focused upon a more thoughtful, inclusive guy.
It's too bad.
Shhh... they won't believe that. I'm a charter member of the he-man woman haters club. That, they will buy and come back for seconds.
You're right. Your comment has been posted on a k.d. lang website with straight and gay members might I add. We all have the same opinion of you it seems.. YOU sir, are the one that is RUDE and could use an attitude adjustment! Since you can't see what is being said about your sorry ass on this website.. I'm going to post some responses you have gotten on there... just out of the kindness of my heart. Enjoy!
1. People like that get on my nerves with their negative interpretation on an audience. But I suppose each to their own opinion. I think maybe this person has issues with lesbians in general and they happened to be a gathering of many!! We come in all sizes, shapes, colors, and haircuts!! Even shoes...there was the cutest "femme" couple sitting next to me and they had on strappy black sandals and were decked out...Wonder if this person would have liked them better...I am thinking yes...
2. Wow-too bad about that person's negative attitude about lesbians filled with reductive typecasting. How sad that someone lives like that with so much hatred and negativity. He (she?) makes it sound like we're some rare, obnoxious species from another planet. Me-I love lesbians. The more, the better. But even more, I don't divide people into categories. Even so, I have to say that at Clearwater there were LOTS of good looking lesbians in very nice looking clothes. I mean not that I was looking...just there for the music of course.
3. Obvious homophobe with issues. People like that will never change their mind as it's already set before the concert even started. Even straight people come in all shapes and sizes. I just hope everybody had a good time.
4.I also wanted to add that when I saw her in Clearwater it really interested me that he crowd was so mixed-I was happy abou that actually-like it was no big deal to be a lesbian. We were all there together, young, old, fat, skinny, straight, gay-whatever. It was a very comfortable feeling and everyone seemed in a good mood and was very relaxed.
5. Thank y'all for the reviews. I think there was alot of everybody in the audience. My husband and I went and we went with alot of couples and while people were not giving my attention to Dustin, I don't think they were rude. They were overjoyed when k.d. came out but I think the crowd was mixed and respective. Actually it was pretty quiet for the first couple of k.d. songs even. Some people did shout out but I didn't notice k.d. being upset about it and that is normal even somebody shouted about guitar picks but she only seemed to have had a few this time. I think she was absolutely wonderful and I have to agree Dustin was not great but he had a pleasant set. It was abit too boring for my taste.
6. Hi. I'm a newbie here, but went to the concert in Charleston on Sunday night. I've been reading through the comments here and completely blown away and at the same time, not so much.
I guess since "lesbianism" seems to be the topic of rudeness, I feel compelled to write something. I was asked to put something here about the performance and I will......but dang............where's the love?
Maybe it seems pointless, but I'm a straight female, married with kids. Did it bother me that the crowd majority was gay women? Hell no. Did I say that loud enough? HELL NO! Don't judge the crowd. Seemingly straight couples may or may not be straight couples. I'm just saying.
The fan that asked for the guitar pick was NOT rude. She quietly asked. It was the one that asked her if she brought enough for the whole class.........yeah, that would have been me. The straight Mom from Cincinnati, that drove 4 hours to see her, because her music is soul filling, as far as I'm concerned. I would absolutely consider myself the rude one~but something came over me and I'm sorry to those that had to listen to me.
Yes, there were "coughers" during Dustin's performance. I don't think any of them were intentionally trying to be rude. He even made the statement, that doing performances during FLU season had it's downfalls. He suggested the theater hand out cough drops.
I found nothing, and I mean nothing rude about the crowd. Ninety percent of the time, kd took time to speak to the audience. She could have ignored any comments, changed her mind about her encores, or told me to SHUT UP......but she didn't. I don't believe, that she found US rude. Straight or gay.
Actually, the little elderly woman (an usher) that was spending way too much time trying to work the crowd of cell phones was rude. Maybe there shouldn't have been non conformers, taking pictures, but she made more of scene, weaving in and out of the rows of the theater, than the ones snagging a quick photo opportunity.
We were sitting in the 2nd orchestra section, and I noticed that.
After watching every youtube interview with kd, and considering that I may have been the rudest person at the concert Sunday night, I still don't believe kd was offended. She was a pro, and in the past, has always seemed engaging with her fans. No one was outta line (except for me, the REDNECK).
It truly bothers me that the gay community was basically attacked by this "reviewer". The generalization that all gay women are fat, frumpy, in comfy shoes.......gimme a break. How many femme's were there? And for crying out loud........HOW can that person........oh, forget it......he may have seen ME, and thought I was in drag. Shallow minds drown deeply.
Again, I apologize to all that had to hear ME. I whistled as loud as the next person. k.d. lang brings chills to my skin whenever I hear her sing and you can only imagine what state of mind I had, seeing her in person for the first time.
I'll post my view on the ACTUAL concert later.
I have something to add to this. At one of the concerts in New York, k.d. handed out guitar picks to her fans (without being asked). The review said that it was like communion in church, with people going down to get picks. k.d. is very good to her fans. Us fans that know what to expect at her concerts or just know a little bit about her performing technique, know that there is going to be some love crazed lesbian or even straight woman with a crush on k.d. and they are going to say whatever they want at the time because it is overwhelming to see her perform. I don't think it's very fair of you to judge an audience that has so much love and compassion towards k.d. that they may "act up" a bit during a show. It's not being rude.. it's called being a fan. Thanks.
Not that it matters, kids...I counted a cough within every ten seconds during one song of his set. Yes, I counted. That seems a bit much.
Didn't count any during lang's performance, however. Didn't even hear them during the spaces between songs.
And this makes a first. Never seen random members of an audience beg for collectibles during a show. Tossing guitar picks and drumsticks is sort of traditional. Only a few bands don't do it. But begging for them in the middle of the show, shouting out for them and stopping the show still seems rude, even if she accepts it.
Though what was that quip from her about them being on ebay tomorrow? Funny. Wonder why she'd say something like that?
No hard feelings for Ms. lang. I really did love the show -apparently nobody read the show review which appeared in the newspaper, which this blog linked to for context. That is sort of funny in and of itself.
I think we're going to have to agree to disagree, folks, but that's not really going to work for you guys. Do your worst. Call me some more bad names. Ridicule my sexual orientation, my sex, my state, my city, whatever hasn't been covered. Nobody has worked in my religion or my favorite color.
I'm a Buddhist and I like green.
On the bright side, I would say this exchange has been very enlightening. I have a better understanding of the mindset of what might be a rabid fan. And despite the screams that I'm a homophobe, the biggest beef seems to stem about my choice in using the word chubby. Probably, if I'd used the phrase sleek middle-aged gals, I'd have gotten a lot less grief.
So, until next time...
Most men that I saw there were as you say "chubby". You are stereotyping! How is that not rude? So it's ok for you to be rude? Why is that? Maybe you should work on doing more positive reviews than negative ones if you don't want to hear or see feedback from some pissed off people.
The whole couging situation is just ridiculous! I don't know of anyone that can "control" their coughs. If you have to cough.. you cough. It makes good sense that you didn't hear any coughing during lang's performance for the simple fact that there were 5 people on stage performing... there's a guitar, drums, piano.. whatever up there making noise.. and lang's voice alone is so loud that a cough would be drounded out. I coughed quite a few times as she sang. I had/have a cold. Why on earth would the audience.. or should I say.. lesbians.. cough on purpose? I happened to love Dustin's performance and yes, that's right, I am a lesbian. You need to think before you speak. k.d. lang is a lesbian and I hate to break it to you, but she isn't twiggy! She doesn't even wear shoes because it's more comfortable for her. We are going to have to agree to disagree because you have said some pretty stupid things. I have decided that you complain way too much and maybe you need to work on being more laid back and not so ignorant. You may actually enjoy life a whole lot more. You being a man has nothing to do with why you are being attacked either. I would say the same thing to a woman or anyone if I felt they were stereotyping or just plain ignorant. Not all lesbians hate men. I believe the one's that do though may have had a bad experience. Rape? or something to that affect. Men are more dominant than women so that alone I think can be intimidating. Enough said though well at least on my behalf. You though, I'm sure will have something intelligent and wonderful to say. You always comment back to defend yourself. Nothing you say though is going to really matter at this point. Your first impression was a bad one. Nothing will change that now.
I actually used the word "stereotypical" in the post. But thanks for the lighter slam. It gave me a much needed break. The others will get back to kicking me around soon enough. Maybe tomorrow they can move on to keying my car or writing strongly worded letters to their congressmen... er person.
It's been an enlightening experience.
I sure hope it has been an enlightening experience for you. I hope you learned something from all of this. People.. lesbians.. have feelings just like you and everyone else. You can't tell me that some of the things said on here did not hurt your feelings even just a little bit. I doubt you like being called names or having your line of worked slammed. I'm sorry that it all came down to this, but next time, if you will, just be more positive about something that you may not really know the facts of. Don't judge it. Things aren't always what they may "seem" to be. Take care and I hope you enjoyed the show through all of the turmoil you experienced.
This is not princess as you call her. If you are indeed a Buddhist and "like green" then double triple shame on you because you are not getting anything. A true Buddhist (which k.d. lang happens to be) would never have said what you initially said and would certainly not continue on with any of this. You just ruffle feathers on purpose because you are obviously getting off of all of this. Perhaps you are a person wanting a few moments of fame...ok so you have it. Not very flattering but you have it. And mostly from LESBIANS at that. Just FYI, k.d. lang is a lesbian icon and we are so proud of her. When "the lesbians" yell out in admiration to her, she loves it. What you fail to understand is it is the same difference as an audience of men seeing a woman they admire and find sexy. If the concert would have been someone men thought to be hot then I would imagine there would have been plenty of shouts ad screams. k.d. just happens to be about the sexiest woman around so give us a break...we like what we see and appreciate her. No different than what men do. And by the way...I am a lesbian too and I don't hate men. I just really dislike rude people like you.
If anonymous had any balls at all, he or she wouldn't be posting anonymously. Stupid shit.
Oh, if it were only just one... I'm getting more traffic here than the dessert bar at Ryan's, though only just slightly.
ONE of those has GOT to be my ex wife! I dumped her cause she got chubby and wore low shoes also. Ok.. I lied. She was just plain FAT. (anyone in this crowd fit that description?)
Nope. Not me. I'm 5'8" and 125lbs. That's a size 4 incase you were wondering. Sorry to dissapoint. I can guarentee I could pick up more women than you will ever be able to and if you "dump" someone because they are overweight, you need to go see Dr. Phil because you have ISSUES! Oh, and one more thing.. I sure hope you are in your EARLY 20's because if you are an OLDER "adult" .... you really need to GROW UP!
ps. THIS GOES OUT TO EVIL TWIN'S WIFE... INCASE YOU DIDN'T KNOW, WHEN YOU DON'T HAVE AN ACCOUNT ON HERE, THE POST COMES UP ANONYMOUS! STUPID SHIT!
These guys have gotten way too much attention from us lesbians and it is time to stop feeding their fire. They are idiots and no one change that. Look at the picture of Billy Bob if that is him. Totally gross and he is getting off completely by the posts. I feel for his family and friends. Feel even worse for him. He it pitiful. So let them say anything they want. Don't feed their stupidity anymore. Let this be the last post girls. I am sure he is showing it all to his boys and thinking he is cool. What a creep. Your poor girlfriend or wife...if you have one...sad sad sad for her.
The picture, actually, is Malcolm McDowell from "A Clockwork Orange," a book by Anthony Burgess, a movie by Stanley Kubrick. It's a classic, deals with conformity among other things.
You wouldn't like it. Stick with "Go Fish."
Mostly, the lesbian crowd who has come through here to pitch a fit has been remarkably small-minded, under-informed, reactionary and hopefully, a poor selection of the group as a whole. It's hard to imagine fans of kd lang, whose songs are often complex and thoughtful, to be this dull.
So far, nearly every time one of you, meaning my anonymous new friends, has made a post you've sort of highlighted my points. I've continuously maintained my side and been pretty articulate about the whole thing. Your side has come over and just dumped on me like a gang of schoolyard bullies.
Isn't there something strangely familiar about this scene ladies?
Anyway, the list of my many imagined failings is very large, indeed. Again, what I said is that the lesbians at the kd lang concert I attended were a bit rude. That hasn't changed.
But feel free to keep coming 'round. I'll keep repeating it.
Shouldnt that comment have been: "Your side has come over and just dumped on me like a gang of schoolyard bulldykes". ;)
I've never listend to k.d. langs music, but I loved her in "Dune" and "Twin Peaks".
I liked the review myself. But then again what I like to do "in the bedroom" doesn't define me as a person...so what do I know?
Wow, I thought I'd stumbled across some Jerry Waters rant or something. Ouch man. Keep the faith. Audiences are getting ruder by the year and it always amazes me ... even at the symphony ... when people seem to think that they should have the same mentality as they would use at a high school football game.
lesbians... what do you expect? just take pride in the fact they cant reproduce and will eventually expunge themselves from the gene pool.
most states wont even let them adopt a child and brain wash it into being a gay.
Nah, I can't agree on the bulldykes and the whole expunging from the gene pool thing. I really don't think the ladies who stopped by the wail on me a bit were indicative of most lesbians. They were pissy. They were bitchy and they were wrong, but it was over a stupid concert.
I'm ok with them adopting and marrying. I think committed couples, married couples, should have the same protection that straight couples have.
I really don't think brainwashing people into being gay is a reality.
Wow! So much hatred...and from a group who gets so much hatred themselves. What is it that Alanis Morrisette said? Oh yeah -- "Isn't it ironic? Don't you think?"
With people like this in the world -- male, female, gay, straight -- how do people find ANYONE to love? As the saying goes, the more I see of people, the more I like my dog.
PS: For those of you bitching that unless you have a Blogger account, your posts are anonymous...nice try, but no. You just pick the name/URL selection and only enter a name. But I guess hiding behind your anonymity is easier than taking the 2 seconds necessary to figure that out.
I love a good discussion....
I just want to add a few things. It's the norm for k.d. fans to cat call k.d. at her concerts-she's always up for it (and I even think there's a plant in the audience sometimes that calls out pertinent things)I've been a fan of hers for 16 years and seen her many times in different venues. It's not relevant that the show was in a posh theatre!
Rudeness is, (as I once experienced) a girl talking on her mobile phone whilst Rufus Wainwright was performing a very beautiful quiet song (and as she wasn't chubby or middle aged and quite pretty she obviously wasn't a lesbian lol!)
k.d. has been giving out guitars picks at her shows lately and inviting the audience to come get them.
I cant imagine anyone would purposely cough through a persons performance-if you didn't like it you'd stay in the bar until k.d. came on!
First one of these in a week... Um. 1st, what bugged me wasn't that she offered the guitar picks. Everybody does that. What bothered me was a fan shouting her down on the stage to ask for one. Bad form.
2nd, the coughing went unchecked through the first act, but seemed to entirely vanish by lang. It was theaterwide and not limited to just one or two people. Pretty obviously, they cared enough to get it in check by the second act, but couldn't be bothered in the first. It was thoughtless then rude after the nice piano guy sort of noted it. My thought is if a performer mentions somebody should have handed out cough drops before the show, it might be a good time to go get one. He was acknowledging the distraction.
3rd, this wasn't a bar venue, but a theater show in the city's arts and sciences center. Sure, it ain't the Kennedy Center or Carnegie Hall, New York, but it is different than say... The 40 Watt in Athens or even the civic center. There are just different expectations of behavior.
WOW.
DOUBLE WOW>
I ain't getting in this one, but it sure has been amusing.
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